The Super Collider that Will Destroy the Earth in 6 Days

Unless you have been living under a rock, you probably know that some eggheads in Europe have invented the world's most impressive particle accelerator which will enable particles to be flung at much faster speeds than before. Hold on, it gets better. After playing 'Speed Racer' to see who can throw particles the fastest, they are going to crash these particles together to see what happens.


This is why men get into science. Women probably want to cure disease or something, but not men. All we want to know is, can we blow some stuff up?

This collider has already seen its day in court. Scientists on the outside of this project have claimed that we cannot be sure what will happen when this experiment begins and some theorize that it could create black holes that will destroy our planet.

The eggheads at the Large Hadron Collider (I would have called it the 'Huge Awesome Collider) claim that they have checked their sums and that nothing of the sort will happen. The experiment should give us ideas about what could have started our universe and give more insight
into the nature of subatomic particles, thus unlocking some mystery of quantum physics.

That sounds comforting, nothing to worry about, right?. Oh, did I mention that there was an explosion at the site a few months ago?

The mistakes led to an explosion deep in the tunnel at the Cern particle
accelerator complex near Geneva in Switzerland. It lifted a 20-ton
magnet off its mountings, filling a tunnel with helium gas and forcing
an evacuation.

Um, and that wasn't the first problem of this magnitude.

On Tuesday, March 27, there was a serious failure in a high-pressure test
at CERN of a Fermilab-built "inner-triplet" series of three quadrupole
magnets in the tunnel of the Large Hadron Collider. The magnets focus
the particle beams prior to collision at each of four interaction
points around the accelerator.

They'll switch it on, Wednesday. I'm sure everything will be fine.